Saturday, January 2, 2010

New Year, New Woe: The Death of Penny Licks

Dear 2010,
2009 was particularly shitty
and I had some hope for what you were bringing to the table,
after celebrating New Years with 
pina coladas & the Puerto Rican masterpiece of a concoction: coquito
I thought that maybe you were on my side,
I thought wrong because 
ruin came to my holidays
Penny Licks is closed, for good
I get unusually attached to cutesy, kitsch 
dessert joints in my favorite neighborhoods
my first love was Sugar Sweet Sunshine
the best cupcake shop nestled on Rivington
where the pistachio cupcakes are to die for
and the soft, falling apart array of arm chairs
just suck you in
last year, around the New Year it was closed for a week
My heart sunk at the thought of its demise
no more Bob cupcakes with 
chocolate almond icing and no more strawberry cupcakes with sweet
cream cheese icing and 
heart sprinkles that gave me butterflies
luckily, I was not aware of their vacation period that fell right around Christmas, and my 
heart's joy was fulfilled when I could once again relish in their cupcakes galore
I loved this little place so much
I wrote about it in my Vassar college application & took my interviewer there
I like to think she loved me for me, but she might have just been wooed by the
decadent pumpkin cupcake I ordered for her 
my life is ruined, for Penny Licks has left me
Williamsburg is weeping
the days of stopping in after hitting up my favorite vintage stores & the Salvation army 
are OVER
no more tiny, one dollar cones in assorted vegan flavors
that are actually better than real ice cream
or towering, lumpy scoops of vegan cookie dough 
topped high on a simple sugar cone
to scoop up with my vegan banana chocolate chip oatmeal cookie
yes, I said it: banana chocolate chip oatmeal cookie
a huuuuuuge award worthy cookie with fat chocolate chips and 
great banana flavor
my heart is sobbing at the mere memory
all I ever needed was a new pair of boots, a beautiful cone and a lumpy cookie and I was set
now where will I find that same love?
absolutely nowhere
never will I be able to soothe my ice cream craving & vintage obsession at the same time
so my verdict is that life sucks
and the world is going to the goons
that's the only way I can describe my feelings
because if I cannot have tasty vegan treats at my heart's desire
what can I have?
surely not happiness.

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